An Update-y Update

It seems logical to, first and foremost, report on what I've been up to since I dropped off the face of the earth. As planned, my husband and I moved in July of 2012. In April 2013 we welcomed a baby boy into the world. I'm still working retail, but have gained some perspective about my management job after a year as an underpaid clerk. My ambitions have changed as a result of my motherhood- No, I don't want to be a housewife now! While I was pregnant I discovered the world of midwifery, which has continued to fascinate me even though it no longer has direct relevance in my daily life.
The most relevant thing to update about is my relationship with my husband. In September, we had a conversation that started out like so many had in the past: the difference in our sex drives. But through a simple statement my husband made, this conversation led me to a major, mind blowing revelation- my husband is basically asexual. Looking back over the history of this blog now, this conclusion seems obvious. Clearly it was something I was in denial about. My husband and I had been together for almost six years at the time this conversation occurred. The idea behind being in a relationship is to have someone who knows and is known be you intimately. I feel that I must have been trying pretty hard with some part of myself to have not know this about him.
There have turned out to be two sides to this revelation. On the one hand, it was a giant relief to be able to attribute our relationship problems to something other than a vauge, unknown flaw in myself. In this situation, putting a label on my husband was hugely helpful in letting me look at out relationship differently. I've stopped asking him for sex I know he isn't interested in. If he does initiate something, I gratefully participate and try not to ask for more than is offered.
But....
I probably would not have chosen to marry and start a family with someone who is oriented so very differently from myself. But here we, very much a family unit, which cannot be dismantled without also leaving all three of us (four counting the dog) the poorer for it. As time has gone on, I have started thinking about this with more and more sentiment in the equation. The time we get to spend as a family, and seeing my son develop and become more and more an actual person, makes me very determined to keep our family together.
So here is my difficulty: If I cannot piece together a satisfying sex life between the sex I have with myself and the once-a-month sex I have with my husband, someone else needs to be involved. Many times, my husband has said he doesn't mind if I sleep with women. In the past I found this mildly annoying, as if he felt my feelings for women weren't legit, that they posed no threat to our relationship, unlike other men. I've since adopted the opinion that this is an evolution thing, protecting his genetic material and all that. It was a lot of over thinking over nothing, since I've always been faithful, with only casual glances at women and virtual blindness when it came to men. However, since that fateful late-night conversation in September, my eyes and mind rarely leave the gutter. I develop new crushes fortnightly, on people dramatically ineligible but inevitably in close proximity to me (read: coworkers). It's a problem. I inch closer to finding a ladyfriend but lust after men, the quality of whom mostly inspire endless shame.
Most of the time, I try not to think about all this...stuff. I live my life (which is pretty busy these days) and have put this Big Question on the back burner for the time being. And on the lusty nights.... stash my vibrator where I can find it when I get home from work.