Monday, February 3, 2014

Nightbrain

Over the past several months, I've noticed a strange phenomenon while I'm at work. Scenarios, and sexy fantasies, that seem plainly ludicrous in the daytime seem rather plausible at night. Moreover, they also sound like good ideas. One such recurring idea is The Mother's Daytime Orgy Club. Bring your young kids along to a gathering at another lady's house, and get freaky while members of the group take turns providing childcare in another part of the home. Genius at 2 a.m. Horrifying in the light of day.
Other candidates for Worst Idea Ever are my formally mentioned inappropriate coworker crushes and the requisite accompanying fantasies. It feels almost compulsive, as though anyone who is in close proximity to me, and is the slightest bit eligible as a sexual partner, will eventually star in one of these fantasies.
Week after week I've experienced the frolickings of my imagination during my workday (workevening?) only to be sobered and concerned when I remember these thoughts the next day. What is it about the nighttime that brings this out in me? Is it just the act of being removed from my family responsibilities while I'm at work? It's a topic of some worry, as these passing thoughts grow ever more firmly rooted in my mind. Asexual or not, I should really not cheat on my husband. Or put myself in a position to lose my job. No sex is good enough to justify these risks.